2010

A summary of 2010 via facebook status updates...

       

 

       It's a good life.

 I have dead legs and a permanent grin.

 I just won new bike tires on ebay! Man it feels good to be a winner!

 I’m going to email Al Gore and ask him to bring back global warming.

 I can't find the ipod...maybe I should have bought one that is bigger than a toenail.

 Just made the not so humble move of becoming a fan of the band I'm in...but I must say, I am a fan.

 I’m going to stimulate the economy.

 I just watched Rad and it was...Rad.

 I’m addicted to chap stick.

 I can not feel my feet, but the bike ride was fun!

 I sit, listening to the sounds of sliding cars.

 First day of school update: Forgot a pen for my first class, was late for my second class because I went to the wrong class, and said dumb stuff in my last class. Off to a good start!

         If you have to type "lol" maybe it's not that funny.

 Work, study, practice, corn dog. That is the plan.

 Who's knocking at my door?!! That would be the wind.

 I’m going to make an attempt at normal.

 Mops don't clean messes up, they spread them around.

 ..trying to figure out what I should be when I grow up. Any suggestions?

 "She was a good broad," I overheard the man say as he left the coffee shop, "She was like a brother."

 

I saw a guy jogging today. He wore running shoes, shorts, gloves, sunglasses and a beanie...he forgot his shirt.

 

 I was washing my hands in the restroom, I heard a toilet flush and she walks out of a stall holding some sort of pizza pocket food. She glances at the sinks and continues on her way-neglecting to wash her hands. As I waited in line for a coffee, I saw her again-a lit cigarette in one hand, the last bite of her pocket food in the other. She pops the little morsel of food into her mouth then takes a drag from her cig.

 I saw a guy standing outside Baskin Robbins today. He looked to be enjoying the sunshine, but not his ice cream headache.

 It's a good morning. It's a Friday morning. It's a good morning even though my run this morning consisted of dodging a trail of frozen barf.

 I saw two frat boys on a tandem bicycle this morning. It was 6am and they were headed south—out of town.

 As I was trying to stuff my foot into a shiny black Michael Kors pump, a thirty-something-year-old mom swimming in an XXXL hockey jersey (she wore #3 for Team Twisted) pointed at me, “Now she knows style,” she said to her twelve-year-old daughter. The daughter slurped her Orange Julius, then replied, “High heels mom? I’m 12.”

 I couldn't tell if it was chocolate ice cream or blood that dripped along the sidewalk.

 It seems easier to ride my bike in the pouring rain, than
          to drive...I wouldn't know where to park.

 

He said, “I know your hair is dark now, but still, it just
startles me.” I replied, “Thank you?”

 If you lost your dirty hemp bracelet, it's on the ground by the big mail box, near the nicer trailer park on Palouse River Drive.

 Dodging grasshoppers.

 Chasing birds.

 This morning started off with me saying, "Are you kidding me?" to my alarm.

 I used power tools today and I still have all of my fingers.

 I got invited to a kegger.

 Not to brag but, I woke up with the sweetest 80s bangs.

 I was unintentionally following the bundled up hooded figure through campus. His hands were in his pockets, I could not see his face. He paused for a brief moment, then spewed vomit into the street. He carried on.

 It's -2 outside, but supposedly it really feels like 9 degrees? There's a difference?

His sweat glazed muscles glistened under the florescent lights of the gymnasium. He wore brand new Nike's, athletic shorts, a wife beater and a goatee. Regardless of the heavy breathing and other signs of fatigue, those scissor kicks would not defeat him. I know this because I heard him whisper, "No big deal, no big deal, no big deal..."

 Well, I'm 30. People will take me seriously now...right?